Have you ever wished you could replay some part of your life, or perhaps change what you said to someone? Do you look back on bits of your life with regret or perhaps you feel embarrassed by things you did? I sure do.
This week I started a new job and during the last few days, I’ve found myself thinking about the last job had. I didn’t always see eye to eye with one of my Managers and to be honest, I felt as if I’d failed. Those memories left me lacking confidence and feeling anxious about this new job. Will I be able to do everything well, will I have a better relationship with my Manager, in short will I be successful there?
So often when things don’t work out as we’d hoped in a job or relationship, we finish it and look for a fresh start. But there is often no fresh start because we take the emotional scars from a past experience into the next one.
We carry our past into our future.
If your past was successful and you achieved great things, you will be able to move into the future full of hope and confidence, but if your past is littered with failures and disappointments, you move forwards lacking confidence and doubting yourself. These beliefs affect your behavior which impacts on your ultimate success.
At times my mistakes and failures have felt like a sack of heavy rocks on my back because they drain my joy and sap my confidence. So how can you prevent past mistakes and failures from poisoning the present and the future.
One thing’s for sure, ignoring the past or pretending it didn’t happen is not a strategy for moving beyond mistakes. You have to own what happened and take responsibility for the outcome.
I’ve found the following 5-step process has enabled me to move beyond regret and disappointment to a place of freedom and lightness. Consciously spending time with my failures and mistakes lets me to learn so I’m able to choose and behave differently next time round.When I follow these five steps, my past no longer dictates my future.
I use a journal to work through each of these steps. Because the act of writing is physical, it somehow transports me back into the past as I record my feelings about that time. Writing enables me to capture my emotions and provides insights that open the way forwards.
The five steps are:
I’ve found that it’s only by taking the time and having the courage to go through this five step process that I’m able to move forwards feeling positive and confident in myself.
If you’d like to learn more each of the five steps, I’ve created the booklet:
5 Steps to Moving Beyond Mistakes and Failures.
In this you’ll learn more about why each step is important and how this process will enable you to move forwards without regrets and equipped to deal with similar situations in a way that makes you feel good about yourself.
If you want to break a cycle of behavior or be able to look back on past mistakes without feeling like a failure, click below to get a copy of
5 Steps to Moving Beyond Mistakes and Failures