Do you get up each day and wish you had someone else’s life? What would you change in your life if you could? Your job, your house, your partner or perhaps you are bored and yearn for a different life all together.
For many years, I believed that so long as I was a good person, the things I needed to fulfill me would come to me. But over time I realized that wasn’t happening. Although my life was generally OK, I felt an underlying sense of disappointment and frustration and I didn’t know what to do. It wasn’t the life I’d dreamed of living when I was younger.
Initially I dealt with my unhappiness by keeping busy. I didn’t care what I did, as long as I didn’t have time to think or feel. But my super activity left me feeling drained and exhausted because nothing I did was aligned to the things that were important to me and I wasn’t using my unique abilities and talents.
When I started to burn out, I adopted a new strategy – to fill my life with gratitude and focus my attention on what was good in my life. I knew from experience that gratitude puts things into perspective and releases positive energy into every situation so surely this would make me feel better and more fulfilled. But over time I was shocked to discover that no matter how positive and thankful I was, the emptiness remained within me. I began to understand that when we use gratitude to avoid dealing with situations, it’s like putting a plaster over a deep wound. Thankfulness hides the pain lurking within but it doesn’t deal with the root cause.
Eventually I realized the only way to make the emptiness go away was to change the things that weren’t working and start filling my life with things that mattered to me. But before I could do that, I had to deal with:
We all have limiting beliefs but we aren’t stuck with them for life. If you are not happy with your life right now, I’d encourage you to take a deep look at your beliefs and ask yourself whether these are preventing you from making changes or doing the things you care about. If not, replace them with beliefs that do.
Fear can dominate your life and destroy it or it can guide and help you make decisions to meet your deepest needs. One strategy for dealing with fear is to ignore it, but a better one is to talk with your fears and understand where they come from. If you aren’t happy with your life, take some time to identify the fears that are preventing you from making changes and work out how you want to respond to them.
I believe that every person is entitled to live a life that fits them well and enables them to make a meaningful contribution to others. If you’d like to learn more about how to change your beliefs or overcome fears that are keeping you stuck, my recently published book Superhero Me: How to feel great about yourself and make the world a better place outlines the step by step instructions that I’ve used to change my life.
Don’t sell yourself short and waste your life. You were born to be great and to make the world a better place. You deserve to be happy – deal with the limiting beliefs and fears that are preventing you making changes to create a life you love.
Image by Leonid Kamchenkov